always tired

I seriously need a normal job. This QVC thing is just so tiring. It isn't the work really.. but the hours I am working. 6:30pm - 3:00am is just too akward. Between that job and my high school job I am not getting much sleep. I have been awake for the past 14 hours and will not have a chance to sleep for another 15 more!!! OMG am I going insane!!!! And I'm STILL not getting all the bills paid!!!! -_- I am also angry that I have been working at the HS for 3 months now and still haven't seen any compensation. Mr. M keeps saying "Next week. They take forever to cut checks around here" Well if that's so, why has the new dance teacher gotten paid already? She has only been here, like, 4 weeks!!!! GGGGGRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!

Do you know what it is that I really want to do? I just want to go back to school. I want to be a college student. I want to gain an education so I can get myself out of the mess I am in (and will stay in if I don't DO something about it.) I think it's time I put myse;f first, stop worrying about everything and everyone else and just DO IT! The only thing stopping me is this lease with NL-I don't wan't to leave him with the full burden of renting our apartment. It's not fair to him. I guess there are scholarships I could apply for for housing that could help cover my half in rent, right? I guess I better start looking if I really want this.